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Prudential Financial - Advocates of Patricide Since 1875I had a cable feed running into my computer, and the TV card recorded this life insurance commercial from Prudential Financial. Oh Holy Jesus Christ, our Lord in Heaven, forgive us Americans for our sins. I have not changed the script. The excerpt that you see below is exactly how the commercial plays. The following is an actual Prudential Financial advertisement. Cue sentimental music:
Conspiracy to Commit Insurance Fraud Should Start at an Early AgeWhat kind of kid says that he's happy that his father has life insurance? The murdering kind - the kind that's plotting to kill his father for the Prudential Financial money. A perfect murder requires very careful planning. First, you need good cause. In this scenario, we are witnessing a most adorable, most prodigal son making sure that there is a pot of golden insurance reparations waiting for him, should 'something happen' to his old man. If you happen to be your father's prodigal son, and you plan to commit a bit of patricide for the insurance money (to be scammed from Prudential Financial), you had best be prepared. After a murder, detectives will lean towards those nearest and dearest to the victim. Cast all doubt away from yourself. Behold the face of prodigal innocence:
Prudential Financial wants you to commit patricide. Prudential Financial wants you to kill your father. Remember, they also want a 35% cut of your proceeds. KILL YOUR FATHER. You know you want to. KILL YOUR FATHER. Just push him down the stairs. KILL YOUR FATHER. Think of the money. KILL YOUR FATHER. Slice his throat. KILL YOUR FATHER. You won't get caught. KILL YOUR FATHER. Eat his flesh. KILL YOUR FATHER.
Brought to you by Prudential Financial
Written by Dinah Cheshire |
